Girl, 15, Charming But Insane

You can read a multitude of truly bad books and wonder whether your ability to pick a decent read has become non-existent

OR

You can delve deep into your cupboard and unearth an old and reliable favourite and make up for reams of bad plot/prose/characters.

Girl 15, Charming but Insane belongs to the latter category.

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways:

~ The title: It immediately grabs eyeballs. It is quirky, hints at a teen who will rant but in a way that promises to be hilarious and engaging.

~ Main character : Jess. Jess is a dark-haired, slightly (ever-so slightly) overweight Brit teen . She displays typical teen behaviour and rants and rave as one, who is young and mad at the world and it’s uncle, would. But she is also supremely talented and hopes to become a stand-up comedian someday. She’s clumsy, goofy, up for a well-executed prank and has a good heart (outlined by a thin layer of the sarcastic-devil). She hankers after the school’s boy-wonder (Ben Jones); is jealous and proud in equal parts of her beautiful best friend (Flora) and to top it all, comes from a broken family.

~ Aforementioned Broken Family: Jess’s mum is a throwback to the seventies. She is a hare-brained , fighting-for-a-cause librarian. Despite her “men-are-ruthless-manipulative-degenerate-scum-of the-earth” rants, she has a fairly decent relationship with her ex-husband (Jess’ dad). Jess’ dad is an artist living in St.Ives. Although he is wary of expressing sappy-love for his estranged daughter, he shoots a daily horrorscope sms to her. (For e.g. “You will open your wardrobe and find Marilyn Manson roosting there”). It’s an oddly healthy arrangement which seems to work for the trio.

~ Jess’ maternal grandmother: Granny is a blend of old-world fuzziness and homicide-happy bloodthirst. Pulp Fiction is one of her favourite flicks and she routinely scours the papers for grisly murders. She carries her dear departed husband’s ashes around in an urn and it wouldn’t be an odd sight to see said-urn accompanying the rest of the family members at the breakfast table.

~Love Interest: The apple of Jess’s forbidden lust is Ben Jones --- Blonde, blue-eyed and beautiful in a Beckham look-alike way. Luckily, the author has not typecast Ben as a love ‘em and chuck’ em type. He displays a refreshing sensitivity for a high school jock and is a likeable character.

~Best mate (and potential love interest): You have to love Fred Parsons. He is tall, gangly and smart-mouthed. Bearing a resemblance to the humble owl, Fred is Jess’ partner in comedic-crime. He’s witty, prone to mouthing exaggerated dialogue and is Jess’ true port in a storm.

There are several other factors that work together to make this a truly enjoyable read. The droll British humour combined with Jess’ fantastical imagination and over-the-top musings make you smile.

This is a book that makes it to my list of *must-haves* + *must-travel-with* + *must-store-with-ardent-adoration-in-silk-lined-trunk* + *must-possess-in-new-land-after-surviving-the-apocalypse*.

City of Glass (The Mortal Instruments, Book #3)

Okay, first of all...I am a certified wuss. I can’t read a book that has paranormal over (and under)tones in the latter half of the day. All vamp/werewolf/faerie/demon lit. is reserved for daylight hours.

CITY OF GLASS however, was the happy exception. I was ensnared so deeply into the politics of the ShadowWorld, that I could ignore the big yellow streak that runs down my back and devoured the book well into the wee hours of the night.

I believe that when a series progresses from *ho-hum* in the first instalment to *HELL’S BELLS-I-NEVER-ANTICIPATED-THAT!!!* in the last instalment; it’s a winner. When you actually begin to care about the characters and their emotional health; when you hope and pray that there’s a happy ending; when you already start plotting fan-fiction in your head; when you think that it would be kinda cool to run into a particular character in everyday life....then.....then you know that the author has done a slap-up job of creating a parallel world that is utterly believable.

The third instalment of The Mortal Instruments series was all that and much more. The city here, refers to Alicante; the home city of The Nephilim. Jace, Clary and Simon are placed in the eye of the approaching storm and battle out their individual demons as hell LITERALLY breaks loose. There is panic, chaos, unveiling of dark secrets, the breaking of hope and it’s resurrection and some cool (and a tad graphic) action. The worlds of The ShadowHunters and The DownWorlders collide in an explosion that keeps you hooked till the very end.

Clary blossoms into a likeable get-it-sorted heroine. Her amazing rune-etching abilities reach their hilt and she plays her role with aplomb. The author remembers to maintain Clary’s inherent vulnerability. As the battle between good and evil boils over, Clary still frets over her forbidden love for Jace in a manner that never makes you snort with disgust.

Jace is the ultimate emo pinup warrior. The sarcastic, loaded-with-quips-galore hero reveals a more humane and weary side. For all those delusional fans who slaver over the pathetic Mr.Cullen; here’s a hero who is actually worth drooling over. He’s readable and not stuck in a *I-Me-Bella-Me-Bella* bubble that Edward Cullen was floating inside.

Simon remains my favourite character. I am extremely glad about the fact that he wasn’t sidelined and given an unbelievable (and extremely bile-inducing) ending a la Jacob Black.

In conclusion, CITY OF GLASS justifies all the 5-star ratings that peppered it’s GoodReads page. It was sublime, emotional, filled with grisly bits and had an ending which was extremely satisfying and yet paved the way for a sequel/prequel if the author so desires.

City of Ashes (The Mortal Instruments, Book #2)

CITY OF BONES ended with arch-villain, Valentine vanishing with *The Mortal Cup* (The first of the Mortal Instruments) in his clutches. In his destructive wake, he left behind:

a) His son, Jace. Jace Wayland has to deal with whether he wants to follow in his father’s bigoted footsteps or stay behind with his supportive foster family. He also has to control his less-thn-brotherly feelings towards his supposed sister, Clary.

b) His daughter, Clary. While Clary Fray has no qualms about hating her rotten dad, she’s a tad confused over her feelings for Jace and best-friend Simon. She has brotherly feelings for someone who is NOT her brother and amorous feelings for someone who IS her brother. (It’s confusing, but true). She also has to deal with the fact that her mother Jocelyn (Valentine’s estranged wife and also a ShadowHunter) is deep in the throes of a coma.

Patriarch Valentine however, is hardly concerned about his seriously dysfunctional family. He has more pressing issues. After The Mortal Cup, he now wants to lay his hands on the second Mortal Instrument : *The sword Maellartach*. Once he has his grubby paws around it, Valentine will be able to summon the vilest of demons and use them as an essential tool in his dastardly plans.

~

CITY OF ASHES was a vast improvement on the first instalment. Jace Wayland, the fearless ShadowHunter, displays a vulnerability which makes you empathize which his troubled teenage mind. Clary is more certain in her role as a vigilant warrior who is slowly discovering her special abilities. Simon, the quintessential best friend and closet lover is given a new, slightly bizarre and yet readable twist. Together, the trio play a cool game of thrust and parry as they battle with their changing worlds and burgeoning emotions.

New characters (Maia, The Inquisitor) lay promising groundwork for the next instalment. Old favourites like Magnus Bane, Luke and Alec show depth and add multiple layers to their fixed roles.

In all, engrossing and page-turnable (I don’t even know if that is a word!!!). Definitely worth the decision of buying books 2 and 3 together.

City of Bones (The Mortal Instruments, Book #1)

15-year-old Clary Fray is a resident of New York City. The people who matter to her are: her single artist mum, Jocelyn; her mum’s friend and father-figure, Luke Garroway and her best friend, Simon. Life is happy trip of pursuing her own art and visiting the nightspots of Manhattan with Simon.

But everything changes one night at Club Pandemonium. She witnesses a murder. A murder committed by three teenagers who have weird symbols on their bodies and who apparently cannot be seen by anyone except her. Oddly enough, the victim isn’t visible to anyone besides her either. Suddenly matters take a grave turn when her mother goes missing without a clue.

Clary’s world is suddenly no longer a simplistic routine existence. She learns that her mother’s disappearance is no ordinary kidnapping. It is intricately linked with the presence of a group of supernatural warriors called “The ShadowHunters”. The ShadowHunters hunt demons and do their best to maintain peace amongst humans. And there is a possibility that Clary Fray could very well be one such warrior.

Fighting her growing attraction to fellow ShadowHunter, Jace Wayland....searching for her missing mother.....being thrown headlong into an ongoing battle with a resurrected villain, Valentine.....dealing with the fantastical new world flowering up before her eyes....and trying to make sense of her mixed feeling about Simon; Clary has her work cut out.

~

Okay first up, Harry Potter still RULES! The world of Clary Fray, while intriguing is a bit crowded. The author displays her love for all things paranormal by stuffing the pages with vampires, werewolves, elves, faeries, angels, ancient demons, new evils and what-have-you. After some time...you just want to sift through the carnival of slitted-eyes and bared-fangs and unkempt-fur and concentrate on the main issues.

Secondly, Valentine is a poor villain. Besides channelling ol’Voldy’s rant of keeping things “pure-blood” he lacks the sheer presence which Voldemort created especially in his absence. All Valentine does is come across as a dysfunctional father who should be pouring out his woes to Dr.Phil as soon as possible.

The only concept I truly liked was that of The Runes. The crucial part that they play in the world of The ShadowHunters is enchanting. They were cleverly woven in to provide a fresh twist to an otherwise standard fantasy-read.

I think I’ll most probably be following this series to find out where the *Clary-Jace-Simon* triangle is heading. Lots of drama there to keep me hooked for a couple of lack-lustre summer afternoons.

In all, an okay read. Clary is a competent heroine who promises to rev things up in the forthcoming instalments. Jace, despite his sarcastic quips and Golden-Boy act has enough issues to make him a tragic main-lead. And Simon has the necessary mix of stability and simmering resentment to provide adequate angst to keep turning the pages.

AWAKENED (House of Night, #8)

The House of Night series is a guilty pleasure. It is not exactly evolved literature which leaves you with a sense of wonderment. Then again, unlike The Twilight Saga (which makes me cringe and wince and want to hurl myself at the closest wooden stake), this series is strangely addictive and in certain places, even redeemable.

AWAKENED is the eighth book in the series. Zoey Redbird and her Warrior/Guardian/Conveniently super-hot boyfriend; Stark have returned from the Otherworld. Heart-almost-whole, the sappy duo have defeated the mighty Kalona yet again. They now plan to spend some quality time recuperating on the magical island of Skye, under the benevolent eye of the mystical, supremely powerful and infinitely cool Queen Sgiach. In the midst of all this relaxation, they finally do the “deed” and are as happy as a pair of proverbial lovebirds.

But the real world (or as real as a world populated by vampyres, monsters and immortal Gods can be) beckons.

Kalona’s failure to swipe out Zoey means that the poor immortal now owes an oath-sworn debt to Ms.Nefariously Noxious Neferet. She doesn’t much care for the fact that Zoey is sitting pretty on the impenetrable island of Skye. She wants her back....back in Tulsa, where she can annihiliate the young Priestess. And if killing an innocent will achieve this end, then so be it.

And then there’s good ol’Stevie Rae. The powerful Red One is stuck in a Catch-22 situation over her love for the Raven Mocker, Rephaim. She can’t tell anybody about falling for the enemy and she can’t keep it hidden much longer. Teen-angst at it’s volatile best.
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Like most followers of the House of Night series, I am really hooked on the *Stevie Rae-Rephaim* connection. Zoey may be the main character, but apart from whining and whingeing and sucking face with Stark she makes for a dodgy main-lead. I frankly don’t have much patience for her. Stevie Rae on the other hand, is facing all the trials and tribulations that a protagonist gets bludgeoned with. In the absence of Zoey for a sizeable portion of the action; she has to deal with Neferet’s manic plots, the loss of a close friend, the need to be a responsible High Priestess AND the secrecy of her relationship with Rephaim. I liked AWAKENED for giving the vampyre-monster relationship it’s due.

See also : Marked (House of Night, #1)
See also : Betrayed (House of Night, #2)
See also : Chosen (House of Night, #3)
See also : Untamed (House of Night, #4)
See also : Hunted (House of Night, #5)
See also : Tempted (House of Night, #6)
See also : Burned (House of Night, #7)

See also : Destined (House of Night, #9)

The Illustrated Mum

First up, I loved the title. I was tickled pink by this fresh badge for a heavily-tattooed individual. It immediately flooded my mind with images of a lean young woman whose pale skin was totally blanketed by inked crosses, cryptic motifs and a host of Celtic symbols.

And the story itself floods you with a bucket load of emotion.
It’s a tale of Marigold; a free-spirited, auburn-haired, rocker-vibe infused, covered-with-tattoos mother. She has two young daughters Star and Dolphin, both from different fathers. Marigold sounds like a free-thinker’s dream. You expect the story to be about a fiercely independent heroine who fights against a disapproving society so that she can raise her daughters in the way that she wants them to be raised. You expect the pages to be bursting with flower-power and righteous indignation.

Sadly, life is rarely a walk down a garden path.

Marigold suffers from Manic-Depression. She refuses to believe that she has a problem and the possibility of taking treatment is a non-existent option. Star and Dolphin have become accustomed to their mother’s weird spells. But getting used to something does not necessarily mean that you are resigned to it and willing to accept it with a weary roll of your eyes. Marigold parties hard, gets herself inked at regular intervals, pulls all-nighters with random men, drinks indiscriminately and leaves behind a sorry train-wreck for her daughters.

Star, the elder daughter, used to love her mother’s uniqueness but as she grows up, she seeks the safety of conformity. She cannot excuse Marigold’s "episodes" anymore and just wants a normal life. Dolphin, on the other hand, still loves her mother to distraction. She adores her brightly coloured, covered-like-a-comic-strip parent. She cherishes the little gestures Marigold does in her brief moments of sanity. Dolphin loves Star too and though the affection is reciprocated from both corners, she knows that things will soon come to an ugly head. ‘The Illustrated Mum’ is a book that explains Dolphin’s journey of trying to be an adult in a world that is unpredictable and at times downright scary.

Jacqueline Wilson is a children’s author who has always been credited with taking up serious issues in a child’s life and handling it with a winning combination of sensitivity and humour. In ’The Illustrated Mum’, she tackles a grave issue and leaves you with a little knot in your throat. The comical quips were few, but she makes you ache for Dolphin and her earnestness. Wilson’s preteen heroines are usually full-of-beans and ready to take on the world amidst their own private hells. Dolphin is no different. She raises all your dormant maternal instincts and makes you want to crush her in a big, squishy comforting hug. My only grouse was with the abrupt ending. I didn’t particular appreciate the convenient tying up of odd ends. It felt like a cop-out.

And yet, you clamber till the end since you want a happy-ending for Dolphin.

The Beauty Of Pixar

The Learning Curve

The Learning Curve is late author Melissa Nathan’s final book. And being maudlin wasn’t her style. The book is vibrant, deals with a contemporary issue, has a teensy-tiny feminist touch, is choc-a-bloc with colourful characters and leaves you with a smile on your face.

Nicky Hobbs is a thirty-year old, much-loved school teacher in a primary school. Her gang of friends include fellow teachers : Rob (who she shares a romantic history with), Ally (the big-build best-friend with quips galore) and Pete (the tiny teacher with an elfish appearance). Nicky is a dedicated member of the staff and when she finds herself being made co-deputy head with Rob, she’s thrilled at the challenge. That’s when she’s not dealing with the hot and cold responses emitted by Rob.

Adding fun to the proceedings is the truly eccentric head of the school : Miss.James. She is most definitely a Quentin Blake illustration to the tee and has enough oddities and strength of character to make her a memorable cast-member.

One of Nicky’s favourite students is Oscar. Oscar is intelligent, moody and comes equipped with an absent widowed father. Mark Samuels (Oscar’s father) is the classic workaholic, earning big bucks and working all hours of the day to provide Oscar with an affluent lifestyle. Sadly, the only thing Oscar needs is his father’s presence and free time.

When the disapproving Nicky and the world-weary Mark finally meet, the proverbial sparks fly. Angry (yet hour-glassed figured) teacher V/s Bitter (yet broad-shouldered) single father...the outcome is inevitable.

And then out of the blue, Nicky gets offered the chance to apply for the position of School Head. And so does Rob. Suddenly the blow-cold Rob is sounding out waves of pure heat to Nicky.....talking marriage, babies and white picket-fences. A confused Nicky is now faced with three alternatives:
a) Whole-heartedly pursue the shining climb up the career ladder and most probably say goodbye to dreams of a family-life.
b) Give in to Rob’s oily paintings of a happily-ever-after and agree to play second-fiddle to his ambitions
c) See if there’s something more to the sizzling chemistry between her and Mark Samuels.

A whole lot of soul-searching, a bit of hearty venting and loads of misunderstandings happily scamper along Nathan’s final work. The story was predictable. I found her earlier books (The Nanny ; Persuading Annie) to be loads better. But I guess I have kind of developed an emotional bond with the author and got a bit teary-eyed when I read the Acknowledgements.

Melissa Nathan was in the poignant position of knowing that her book would most probably be published posthumously. Her consequent messages to her dear ones left me with a a sizeable knot in my throat, especially the one written to her three-year old son Sammy.

The last lines go:

“Go into the world knowing that while you were everything to your mother, you won’t have to deal with an annoying woman who can’t stop kissing you when you’re fifteen. I will be in the sky kissing you from afar”

.

The Waitress

Katie Simmonds is an ambitious young lady. This week she wants to be an educational psychologist. The one before that, she wanted to be a teacher. And the week before that, a film director. She’s earned her degree from Oxford and believes that the world is her oyster. Sadly the oyster is yet to be shucked and she’s living out her life as a waitress in a dead-beat cafe. It may not be the best job in the world but it pays the bills and provides a stop-gap while she imagines herself in one glamorous career after the other.

Her love-life isn’t much to write home about. The latest debacle occurs when she runs out on the very endearing, very eligible Dan in the middle of a date.

Dead-End job, Dead-End love-life. Katie’s life is set.

But then things take an ugly turn when the cafe is taken over by new owners. New owners that include the aforementioned Dan. Dan Crichton. The last man she ever wants to run into is now not only running the cafe but playing hoity-toity big bossy to her snarky, sarcastic waitress.

Other interesting characters are
a) Jon: Katie’s waiting-to-be discovered author roommate. Much of his practice writing includes penning down glorified resumes to bolster Katie’s ever changing career options.
b) Sukie : Katie’s waiting-be-discovered actor best-friend. She’s gorgeous and talented and true to her art. Sadly she’s yet to get her big-break and continues to try out for a series of go-nowhere auditions. She also ekes out a living as fellow waitress with Katie
c) Matt : The teenage dishwasher at the cafe. Morose, bludgeoned by pimples and the fear that he will die a virgin makes him a real charmer.

Melissa Nathan’s books are like addictive sitcoms complete with punchy dialogue and unexpected cliffhangers. Her characters try to take the less-travelled path, trip over many pitfalls and emerge victorious.

Another winner from the Nathan stable.

Persuading Annie

Once upon a time....the beautiful, auburn headed, vivacious teenager Annie Markham had an awful scare. She thought that she was pregnant. And when she shared this bit of news with her teen boyfriend, Jake...he turned an unbecoming shade of puce, yelled out a panicky speech and promptly fainted. Vivacious Annie should have seen this as a prologue for things to come. But when she discovered that she wasn’t really pregnant, she told Jake again. The gallant Jake promptly turned a slimy shade of green, yelled out another heart-ripping speech and promptly disappeared. Annie should have listened to her wise Godmother Susannah’s advice. Men weren’t to be trusted.

The End.

Once upon a more recent time, Annie Markham is a beautiful young lady. She has a heart of gold, works at a local art gallery, moonlights as a phone Samaritan and seems to be the only sensible duckling in an eccentric self-absorbed family of pretentious swans. But the bouncing curls and witty facade hide an embittered soul. Annie has never really got over Jake’s abrupt departure from her life and he continues to colour all her interactions with the opposite sex.

But Annie has more pressing problems. The once-flourishing family business is in danger of folding. Her figure-head (in every sense of the word) of a father is too busy chasing everything in a short-skirt to do anything useful. Her eldest sister, Katherine is single and too busy playing coiffed socialite to contribute anything meaningful. Her middle sister Victoria is too busy being stuck in a dead-end marriage to the lovable yet golf-crazed Charles and lives out the daily drama of playing hapless mother to two energetic tots.

Susannah, who now works for Markhams decides to bring in the best Managment-Consultant team to save the company from bankruptcy. Said Management Company is headed by the dynamic Jake Mead. Yep, the very same: turn into the colours of a rainbow ->faint -> run Jake from Annie’s past. Jake, despite being hugely successful and handsome to boot, has never really recovered from what he believes to be Annie’s duplicity. When he learns that Annie is the youngest member of the Markham family, he sees this as a perfect opportunity to seek some long-overdue revenge (or "closure", as his psychiatrist would like to stress). Annie too, is determined to be stoic/sarcastic/condescending when she encounters the big howling ghost from her past.

But the best-laid plans of management gurus and curly-topped viragoes can always hit a roadblock. Soon the two find themselves thrown into improbable situations that result in unexpected results.

The witty Melissa Nathan strikes yet again. Her writing is cheeky, loaded with quips and generously peppered with realistic insights into the minds of different personalities. The characters may seem like caricatures, but they revel in their predictabilities. Annie is an endearing heroine, Jake has the requisite charm to make you overlook his pigheadedness and the rest of the supporting cast have enough eccentricities to keep you hooked till the last page.